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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24392836">negative attention at best</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercury_wings/pseuds/mercury_wings'>mercury_wings</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Homestuck</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, Multi, adults being functional (not really), davekat engaged !!and happy!!!, eridan as well, erisol is slowburn, humanstuck AU, its Unhealthy, karkat is done w everyone, police mystery au, rag-tag police team karkat sollux and eridan GO, since they are all in their mid twenties, their personalities might seem ooc, theres a lot of smoking in this, unhealthy coping mechanisms...looking at you kankri</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:08:49</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>17,512</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24392836</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercury_wings/pseuds/mercury_wings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>One day, Cronus Ampora disappeared from his friends' and family's lives as if he had never existed to begin with. He was left for dead, case closed, end of story.</p><p> </p><p>Three years later, self-proclaimed best detective ever Sollux Captor luckily stumbles across a very interesting phone call. Along with Karkat Vantas (the world's loudest policeman) and Eridan Ampora (tired sniper/smoker), he decides to finally solve that case.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Cronus Ampora/Kankri Vantas, Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Eridan Ampora &amp; Sollux Captor &amp; Karkat Vantas, Eridan Ampora/Sollux Captor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>60</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. intro - rooftop dissociation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>let's be honest the only knowledge i have of how the police works is from brooklyn 99...</p><p>the title comes from the song oh klahoma by jack stauber ! i really like his style, and i wrote most of this fic by listening to his songs haha</p><p>if i tagged the character or ship, that means they/it will be relevant in the story and not just mentioned once. a lot more info can be found in my stupid tags haha</p><p> </p><p>this said, enjoy !</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The thing Eridan remembers best about his brother is the excruciating smell of his cheap cigarettes.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Cronus Ampora was really rarely seen with his mouth empty. Wherever he went, a cigarette (lit or not) rested between his chapped lips. He pretended that smoking made him look cooler, and deepened his voice, and that Eridan should try it too. Said little brother had always refused, because everyone knows smoking is bad for your lungs, and as a swimmer he needed his lungs more than anyone else.</p><p><br/>
But here he was right now, standing on top of a building, absentmindedly inhaling smoke as if he had done it all his life. Out of habit, he pulls it out of his mouth without even thinking about it and puts it out on the ground. Three years ago, he would have been grimacing at the simple sight of a package of cigarettes, but today he never went anywhere without them. </p><p> </p><p><br/>
The last time he had seen Cronus, he was smoking. He had chastised him about it too, actually. </p><p><br/>
It was funny to think the last words Eridan ever heard his brother say were “Fuck you, I do what I want.” Typical Cronus. Going around acting as if he did not care about anything when in reality he was all too much aware about...everything. He was aware of how bad smoking was for him. He was aware of the very real worry his brother and friends expressed about it.</p><p><br/>
But he never quit. Or at least Eridan never saw him quit.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Because three years ago, after he left Cronus smoking in front of his apartment door, the young man just vanished. Disappeared straight out of his life without any struggle, as if he had never been there to begin with. He remembers the foul smell of cigarettes that had followed him all the way to work, remembers muttering curses under his breath directed towards his brother, remembers his friends making fun of him.</p><p><br/>
He also remembers coming back home and finding his father seated on the sofa. Remembers how the only words he said were “Cronus is gone. Forget about him.” and then </p><p><br/>
Then he had never spoken about him ever again. Eridan had gotten very angry, that night. He had called Cronus over and over again, leaving furious voice messages which gradually became more and more panicked, ending with actual sobs. That had been useless, because he had discovered his brother's phone in his bedroom the next morning. Only 34% of battery were left.</p><p><br/>
And he remembers crushing that phone into bits and pieces right there on the ground, shards of glass and circuitry flying around him. He still had a little scar on his wrist from that outburst, but in hindsight, he does not regret it in the slightest.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
What Eridan remembers about that day was now more of a blurry mix of boiling rage followed by frozen dread. Because smashing things was all dandy, but he had to face the facts eventually. Facts which were that his brother was gone, not quite dead but that apparently did not matter, and that his father did not give a single shit about it.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Not that his father ever gave a shit about anything regarding them anyways.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Thinking about Cronus always left him with a faded view of the world surrounding him and a terrible craving for cigarettes. Right now, the lights of the city down below are muted, and so are the sounds of busy traffic, everything melting into an unsettlingly quiet tableau. His hand itches down to his pocket as he draws a deep breath, blinking hard to stabilize his vision and pretend his eyes were not wet.</p><p><br/>
The edges of the buildings around him sharpen when he finally manages to burn up a new cigarette, fingers trembling around the flickering lighter. He inhales, slowly, letting that disgusting smell wrap around his brain, before exhaling through his nose. Smoking was really painful. Even after three full years, he still hates it.</p><p><br/>
There is a low buzzing at the back of his mind, and he rubs a finger on his neck to make it stop. That obviously does not work, and he bites down on the thing in his mouth instead—which was also a pretty stupid move, but he really did not care. He had seen Cronus munch on unlit cigarettes more than once, as a substitute for smoking them, and although it was not healthy, it at least prevented him from fucking his lungs up all the time.</p><p><br/>
Eridan kneels down, still smoking, puckering his lips as he checks his watch. He was early, as always, securing the perimeter before Jake and Jade arrived. It was a sort of habit he had taken from the first mission the three shared, and he was not planning on giving it up soon because his two partners were idiotic airheads who were way too relaxed about the whole sniper mumbo jumbo.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Tonight, he reminds itself, chewing on his cigarette, their squad was taking down a strategic hideout of one of the most notorious underground smuggling organization, and he had to be as focused as possible. He starts setting up his gun methodically, double checking the shooting angle as he did and counting his ammo.</p><p><br/>
The ash on his tongue is too heavy, creating a ball of anxiety in the pit of his stomach, all for not the good reason. Today, the fifth of February, was Cronus' birthday. Was being key word, because it did not matter anymore. Eridan can feel the start of a migraine gnawing at his temples already, which was less than good, and he spits out the cigarette before stepping on it a few times for good measure.</p><p><br/>
Take deep breaths of air tasting like melting ice cubes. Your name is Eridan Ampora. You are 24 years old. You work in the police force as a uniformed officer, and you are very good with guns, which is why you have been appointed to the position of sniper in this specific intervention. You have an okay life, sharing your flat with Feferi Peixes, a friend of yours who works as a marine expert in the aquarium of the town. </p><p><br/>
And most importantly, your brother Cronus Ampora has been missing for three years, and you have to stop thinking about him. His case is frozen now, because no new lead popped up, and his father was not bothered enough to actually invest a little bit of his ridiculously big fortune in order to search for him. </p><p> </p><p><br/>
Down below in the city, a few car honks reach his ears, and a series of other traffic noises follow, pulling him slowly back into the present. The therapist he used to see three years ago had told him about this routine, to review all the stuff that made him <em>himself</em> whenever he slipped out of his own body. It worked most of the time, but on a few occasions he had found himself unable to remember easy things like his own birthday....but he shakes his head vigorously. Focus.</p><p><br/>
Eridan switches on his phone, squinting as the harsh blue light hits his glasses but thankful at how quickly it manages to fling him back to the very real time and day displayed on it. Jake and Jade still were not here, and that was fine since it was a little early, but he was starting to feel like loneliness would push him back into seriously pathetic thoughts about his brother, so he dials a number.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Yo fuckface what do you want !” he ...did not expect such a quick answer.</p><p><br/>
“Hey kar, nothin much, just wondered how you were holdin up.” Karkat Vantas, one of his closest friends in the force, was also involved in this intervention. Though since he sucked major ass at handling any long range firearm, he was going to be part of the team which would actually break in the place.</p><p><br/>
This was an important intervention for him, because it marked the day he would see his fiancee, who had been undercover for three months, again. So Eridan was checking up on him. Just like any other good friend would.</p><p><br/>
He can hear the very loud silence Karkat gives him in lieu of a response, and it makes him smile. “I’m surprised at your eloquence.”</p><p><br/>
“Fuck,” he sputters, voice saturated in the phone, “I dunno. I'm so fucking excited I might shit my pants, this is so fucking weird !”</p><p><br/>
He laughs good naturedly, though it sounds more like a weak snort, but he guesses it was better than nothing. Better than thinking about—"That’s gross.”</p><p><br/>
“Are you calling me just to make fun of me ? Fuck you, Ampora ! Unlike your lazy ass I'm actually gonna go in and punch bad guys. Beat that !”</p><p><br/>
“Yeah yeah, I’m sooo impressed kar.” Karkat barks back another crude insult. “Anyways, really, how are you feelin about the whole Dave thing. I mean, it's been a while. Like if I saw Cronus again all of a sudden today, I'd have no idea what to say, y'know.”</p><p><br/>
The last remarks stings his heart a little, and he kind of regrets saying it out, but it was true. Somewhere, a part of him was jealous of Karkat, and who would not be ? He hears him groan through the receiver, and can visualise him running a hand through his wild hair. </p><p><br/>
“Uh...God, I dunno. Really dunno. I guess I’ve been thinking more about what I'm gonna do to him more than what I'm gonna say...” he chortles at the end of his sentence, a point of glee slipping through.</p><p><br/>
“Guess that makes sense.” A small silence follows. Even through the phone line, Eridan can hear the distinct sound of Karkat scratching his collar, which he did when he was itching to say something. “Is something wrong ?” he asks, immediately getting a heavy sigh as an answer.</p><p><br/>
“No—I, ugh, look, shit,” he mumbles quickly, following up with a long groan. “I’m just...I'm just really antsy ? I mean I know Dave loves me because who fucking proposes to someone they don't love, and like I missed him a whole fucking bunch and it just made me realize how much I cared ? And it's giving me all sorts of new types of feelings and I dunno what to do with them.”</p><p><br/>
“I understand.” And god, he did. “I know it's a different situation, fair and square, but I never noticed how big of a role Cronus played in my life before he disappeared.” </p><p><br/>
He pauses, almost expecting Karkat to yell at him, but he kept quiet. “Livin life without him...was different. Very different. Like a whole chunk of me had been taken away, and I had to kind of...accommodate.” He takes a shaky breath. “Sorry. Wasn’t plannin on makin this about me.”</p><p><br/>
“Nah man, it's fine.” The other sounded unnaturally soft. “You’re right. I never really got why you missed your bastard brother so much, because I kind of felt like if Kankri disappeared I'd be fine with it—even happy, cause he wouldn't be there to piss me off, right ?”</p><p><br/>
Eridan gives him a half-assed chuckle as a response, and he continues. “And yeah what I have with my brother is different from what I have with Dave, thank god, but like...I guess I understand the whole ‘missing a person so bad you physically feel yourself fading out of reality’ shtick better now. And man...it's not fucking pleasant.”</p><p><br/>
“You don't say.” </p><p><br/>
“Yeah yeah, whatever. It's all fucking over, finally may I fucking add, cause I'm getting Dave back to-fucking-day !” his voice rises in intensity, ending a little too loud and clear for Eridan's liking at the end. Karkat adds a breathy laugh, bubbling from the back of his throat. It was so full of joy that it made the other feel almost sick, in a twisted way. He bites back bile.</p><p><br/>
“Well, I'm glad you're doing good. Don't mess up too bad, okay ?” he eventually finds himself saying, almost feeling worse than before starting this conversation. While he presses two fingers on the hard lump of his Adam’s apple, he furiously hopes Jake and Jade’s antics would distract him better.</p><p><br/>
Karkat mutters a “Yeah yeah whatever.” In response, before once again falling in a meaningful silence. Eridan almost snaps at him out of frustration, pushing back down his selfish anger as well as he could. Then, “Eridan, are you okay ?”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Taken aback, he takes a few seconds to dumbly think. “Honestly ? Not really. But I got to be, for the sake of the operation.”</p><p><br/>
“Y’know, Kankri was also really nostalgic today for some reason.” Eridan bites his tongue. Hard. “Like he didn't get mad when I called him to talk about Dave. Can you believe it ? I don't even think half his sentences had more than ten words in them. Was like he finally learned how to properly talk. Kinda weird though !”</p><p><br/>
He inhales as calmly as he could. “Hm. It's his birthday today.”</p><p> </p><p>“Who’s ?”</p><p> </p><p>“Take a motherfuckin guess.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Oh.” He gives a respectful silence. “I kinda feel like an asshole now.”</p><p><br/>
“You've always been an asshole, kar, this doesn't change jackshit.” </p><p><br/>
Karkat huffs out an indignant but mild curse. It was weird. Talking about Cronus to anybody else than himself was weird. It was true he did his best to bring out the topic around his father, just to piss him off, and he had spoken with his therapist obviously, but other than that he did his best to keep it a secret. Not that he did not like bitching about his problems; it is just that the disappearance of a family member often brought more awkward pitying looks then actual reactions out of people.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Hey, man,” the rough voice pulls him out of his thoughts quite violently, “about that. I wanted to talk to you about something.”</p><p><br/>
He cocks a curious eyebrow, although aware that Karkat could not see it. “Yeah ?”</p><p><br/>
“Okay, but you gotta promise me this won't get in the middle of your efficiency.” He quickly enunciates, oddly nervous.</p><p><br/>
“Spit it out, kar.”</p><p><br/>
“Right, fine, but y’gotta promise, cause I wasn't supposed to tell you before all of this was over !”</p><p><br/>
“Jeez, what the fuck,” he rolls his eyes, speaking evenly, but his heart was starting to hurt his chest. “Fine ! I fucking promise. All good now ?”</p><p><br/>
Karkat inhales deeply, muttering intelligible rude things to himself, before exhaling very loudly. “Okay. Okay, okay. Don't freak out, though.”</p><p><br/>
“Vantas ! Spit it. Out !”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“New leads were found about your brother’s case !”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. coffee good, cigarettes bad</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It has been a hard week for Sollux Captor, and it is only Tuesday. He needed a nap, but that was not going to happen now, was it ?</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Am I actually developing the plot AND putting erisol interaction ? Impossible. Yet, it is happening right in front of your eyes</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The coffee machine was broken. Again. </p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>Sollux glares at the all too cheerful ‘s0rry : ) !’ written in bright red ink and taped to the fuming device, considering whether he should go down to the forensics lab and immediately end Aradia's life or not. Feeling magnanimous for once, and also pretty exhausted, he decides to let her live this one. Next time though she would have to catch his hands.</p>
<p><br/>With a loud groan, he makes his way to his desk in the open space, catching a few amused looks from his co-workers as he does. Yesterday had been one hell of a night, and all he wanted was to drink his weight in pure black coffee but oh no, stupid buff Aradia had to beat him to the machine and break it before he even arrived to work. He unceremoniously drops his bag to the floor, and heavily falls down on his worn-out chair, before turning his computer on. Its light hurts his eyes, even behind his super cool and not ugly at all bicoloured shades, and he claws at his face to make it stop.</p>
<p><br/>He remembers getting an all too ecstatic slash energetic call from Karkat last night, which had effectively woken him up at two in the morning. He hated his friends. So much. All they did was break coffee machines, destroy his sleep schedule, and make fun of his physique (it was normal and totally not lame to lose against Karkat, an actual uniformed officer with years of training ! honestly, not many people could take that guy on without the risk of losing a limb). </p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>Anyways. Said stupid Vantas had called him, yelling as always about taking a few days off with his fiancee, and asking Sollux to check through the files on his desk just in case there was something important he had missed. He had also talked for a long time about how badass he had been during their operation, which was unsurprising to say the least, and how many perps they had caught...etc etc. To be entirely honest, Sollux had kind of dozed off halfway through, and only remembered bits and pieces. Not that it had been an important conversation. Who had important conversations at 2 am ?? Not Sollux Captor, that’s for sure.</p>
<p><br/>He scratches a spot behind his ear while navigating through the last open documents on his computer. A lot of administration to fill in, some cases to wrap up...Nothing too nerve-wracking or brain-melting.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>Nothing but that one voice message.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>His eyes absentmindedly travel back to the top right corner of his desktop, where he had pinned the audio file under ‘LII2TEN AGAIIN.’ Being good with computers (and a big nerd), Sollux was not only working as detective but also expert in communication interception and code-cracking when it came to stealing data from underground organisations. This was not the first time he stumbled across a weird conversation—stumbling across weird and illegal conversations was his job—but this short audio file in particular kind of irritated his braincells. </p>
<p><br/>See, when he intercepted phone conversations like these, he often easily managed to link them back to a certain organisation or at least find someone else in the squad who knew of it. He would send it to his superiors, sort through IP addresses, find a few other voice samples which matched, and case closed for him. There was always another detective, another squad, another officer who would be able to say “oh right ! This is relevant to my case !” but this was an exception.</p>
<p><br/>All because the voice sample had been immediately recognized by his computer as the one of an ancient perp, and upon listening to it a few times along with the old samples, Sollux was like 99% that it matched. But it really should not.</p>
<p><br/>Since the perp in question had been labelled as dead for the past three years. Plus, it was kind of a big deal; the officer in charge of his case at the time, Meenah, had really went through every single nook and cranny of that shit. And if Meenah fucking Peixes could not solve a case, then nobody could. Except maybe Sollux, but again, he may have found this voice sample but he did not understand jack shit about it.</p>
<p><br/>Maybe it was not even worth showing to Meenah. She would probably beat him up for making fun of her or something. And gosh was she scary.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>He is pulled out of his thoughts when he hears two sharp knocks on his desk. Raising his eyes from the laptop, he meets the face of a uniformed officer who looked very, very pissed. From the bags under his eyes, Sollux supposes he was involved in the whole mess with Vantas yesterday night.</p>
<p><br/>“Can I do something for you ?” he asks, leaning back in his chair to assert his position as a comfortable and smart asshole who was totally in control of his workplace and no, there was not an empty subway bag on the ground. The officer raises his eyebrows, unimpressed, before pulling out his phone.</p>
<p><br/>“Sollux...Captor, right ?” he questions, gaze flickering from his phone to the other's face. Sollux blinks.</p>
<p><br/>“That’s me.”</p>
<p><br/>The guy sighs in what seems to be relief, before sitting down on the chair in front of his desk swiftly. Sollux wonders if all uniformed officers had this kind of impressive way of making every gesture professional, and then he remembers Karkat. “You still haven't told me why you're here. Gonna throw me in jail ?”</p>
<p><br/>He rolls his eyes. “No. A friend of mine told me you found a lead in a case that interests me. His name is Karkat ?”</p>
<p><br/>“Karkat as in small angry stupid gay Karkat Vantas ?” The officer cracks a smile, and Sollux silently congratulates himself. “Yeah, I know him.”</p>
<p><br/>“I guessed you did. He was supposed to come pick up that lead you found today for me, but he's takin a few days off as you must know. So, I'm here. Glad I didn’t get the wrong guy.”</p>
<p><br/>“How did you guess who I was ?”</p>
<p><br/>The smile on his face widens a little. “Kar has a way with words.”</p>
<p><br/>“The fucker...” he grumbles, very certain that the given description of him was less than flattering, but accurate enough that this guy had found him in a few seconds top. There went his ego for the day.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>He takes a moment to observe the officer seated in front of him. Other than the ugly black shadows on his cheeks, he looked alright. He remembers seeing him around a few times, but never really thinking about speaking to him, because he looked way too clean and classy to be seen with someone like Sollux. His uniform was pristine, and so was his hair (damn, how much gel was in that thing ?). He also had a jawline which looked capable of cutting an apple in two, so that was...a plus.</p>
<p><br/>“Anyways, I'm Eridan Ampora.” Gosh, even his name sounded posh. “Nice to meet you, I suppose.”</p>
<p><br/>Sollux catches very clearly the way his nose scrunches at the ‘I suppose’, making his black rimmed glasses hop on his face. He was not wrong though—compared to that impressive stature, the detective felt like he had just crawled out of the dumpster. He regrets not checking his own dirty blonde hair twice before stepping out of his flat.</p>
<p><br/>But fuck it. He did not give a shit fuck about what some random Eridan Ampora thought about him.</p>
<p><br/>Wait. Ampora.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>Oh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re here for that voice message I intercepted, right ?” Eridan flinches, one of his legs nervously jumping on the chair.</p>
<p><br/>“Straight to the point.” He forces a bitter laugh, and Sollux notices that he was pressing a palm on the trembling leg to make it stop; unsuccessfully. </p>
<p><br/>“So like...he's your brother ?”</p>
<p><br/>His eyes narrow. “Just make me listen to the file or so help me, Captor. I'm not here for a pity party.” When the detective crosses his arms, expectantly waiting, he sighs. “Yes, Cronus was my older brother.”</p>
<p><br/><em>Was</em>. That is interesting. Sollux digs out his earphones from his pocket, plugging them in the computer under Eridan's harsh stare. “Don’t get your hopes up, it's a super cryptid message. Told KK about it just because I know his own bro had something to do with this guy.” He shrugs in what he hopes is a detached way, presenting the earphones to the officer in front of him.</p>
<p><br/>Behind his glasses, his two oddly purple-tinged dark blue eyes waver. Sollux does nor miss it, but does not comment on it either. The guy had clearly not slept at all, and from the slight shake of his hand when he picks up the buds, he was not feeling his best. Maybe they could go for a coffee downtown to talk about it once his shift was over; he actually was quite interested in this case. If he solved it, he would earn the respect of everyone, perhaps even score himself a raise ! It was a good opportunity.</p>
<p><br/>“Anythin is better than that radio silence I’ve been forced to for three years.” Eridan snaps, bringing his hands back on his knees once he put in the earbuds. Sollux supposes that he was right, though he almost argues that this voice message was as good as his radio silence. Maybe the Ampora could recognize something—he knew his brother better than Sollux did. Maybe some of it would make sense. Or not. </p>
<p><br/>So he just gives a nonverbal hum as an answer, pressing play on the recording. He expectantly turns back to Eridan, dedicated to pick up any feeling or anything else really that could bring up a new lead. He did not show it, because he was a cool laid back detective, but he had studied the case in his free time and it still occasionally nagged his brain. If this was enough of a lead, maybe he could convince his boss to let him investigate more into it.</p>
<p><br/>Plus, by the way the Ampora's shocked expression completely freezes on his face the moment the familiar voice starts speaking in the earbuds, he was almost certain that he would be 100% on board to help him out. Hell, Karkat would probably follow through as well, just for the sake of his brother. With a little bit of luck, he could even grab whatever Meenah had collected before the case got frozen, and they could go on their way to solve the unsolvable. Aw yeah. Sweet.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Or...not so sweet.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Sollux eventually realizes that the voice message had ended (it was pretty short) but Eridan had not moved. His fingers were digging themselves in his knees so hard that the other almost fears he would rip the fabric of his pants there, but also hesitates to say anything because he feared being snapped in half. So he waits for a bit, drumming a two beat rhythm on his desk instead.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>I can't fuckin believe you’re still keepin me here. Really ! Whatever the fuck your petty reasons are, I'm done with them ! I did all you wanted, and you got your money back, so just let me go now. No excuses !!</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>...</em>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <em>...</em>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <em>...</em>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <em>What ? Are you out of your FUCKIN MIND ? THAT'S NOT WHAT WE AGREED ON ! oh my god, I can't believe it... Fuck—I—just—shit !</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>“Uh, hey dude, I think you kinda stopped breathing there for a sec.” He leans forward after some time, gently tapping the other's shoulder. Eridan jumps up as if he had been electrocuted, blinking harshly a few times, before sucking in a deep but strangled breath. His shaking fingers affair themselves on the earbuds, which he only manages to pull out after a few tries, and hands them over to Sollux who opens his mouth to say something more.</p>
<p><br/>But he chooses otherwise when he meets the other's glare. His eyes were narrowed in two tiny slits, and his entire body was tense. “If you want to discuss it, come outside. I need to smoke.”</p>
<p><br/>With that, he gets up. Sollux curiously watches him, before jumping on his feet as well. This was very, very, very interesting.</p>
<p><br/>“I’ll just let you know that your sex appeal drastically decreased the second you told me you smoked.” He airily declaims, patting his pockets to check if his phone was still there as he trailed behind Eridan. He only gets a noncommittal sigh as a response.</p>
<p><br/>“Don’t care.”</p>
<p><br/>His voice sounded strained, as if speaking had become terribly difficult all of a sudden. Sollux pushes his hands in his pockets, whistling as an answer. He was bad with the whole serious conversations shtick—hell, the squad often did their best to never leave him alone with perps or victims because by the way he spoke, it just felt as if he did not give a single shit about emotional motives and stuff. That stuff was awkward.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And Eridan had probably realized because the second they are out, he pulls out a cigarette out of his pocket in the swiftest motion, and flicks his lighter on just as fast without even looking at Sollux.</p>
<p><br/>“I suppose you don't want one ?” he asks between clenched teeth, as the first cloud of smoke grew in front of him.</p>
<p><br/>“Unlike you, I'm healthy.” What a load of bullshit, Karkat would have said. “So no.”</p>
<p><br/>Eridan shrugs. He drags in a long breath, before slowly exhaling, and Sollux finds himself making a grimace at the disgusting smell. “Why you even like those things, I don't get it.”</p>
<p><br/>“I don't like them.” The other confesses, almost weakly. “My brother did, though.”</p>
<p><br/>They let an awkward silence pass between them, as the officer respectfully turns his head away to exhale smoke far from Sollux.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>“Right, anyways. Have any idea what this message was about ?” he finally asks, the question slipping away. Not very subtle, fair enough, but he wanted to get this on the road as quickly as possible.</p>
<p><br/>“He seemed to be talking to someone. Did you not intercept that part ?”</p>
<p><br/>His face breaks into a grin at the spot on question. “Nah. I tried, though. That guy has an impressive protection, so I only managed to snatch a part of the conversation. After that, the line blurs.” Sollux pauses, seeing a shadow pass in the other's eyes.</p>
<p><br/>“Well, this is good enough.” Eridan eventually says. “It...has been three years.”</p>
<p><br/>“Must be weird to hear your bro's voice after all this time like that, huh ? If this can make you feel better, I’m certain this was not pre-recorded. He's alive.”</p>
<p><br/>That seems to shake the guy, because his grip on the cigarette significantly tightens. “I guess...” he is not looking at Sollux anymore, who almost wonders if he is even talking to him, “I kind of...never expected him to...appear again. This feels really unreal.”</p>
<p><br/>“I mean, I can certify it's very very real. Did all the required tests, and all the identification process. If it wasn’t Cronus speaking, then I’ll start believing in god or something.” He laughs, nervously eyeing the other. When he gets no reaction, “No offense.”</p>
<p><br/>“None taken, Captor.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just call me Sollux. Captor is weird.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>He seems taken aback. He then takes a deep breath, which felt quite a bit more confidant and safe than his previous ones. “Fine, Sollux then. Anyways, I guess you're also interested in this case, am I wrong ?”</p>
<p><br/>Sollux gives him a grin, observing as he finally put out his cigarette on the top of a bin. “Yep. And I'm super smart, tops. Prolly the squad’s best when it comes to intel gathering.”</p>
<p><br/>“The Striders beg to disagree.”</p>
<p><br/>“Let them beg.”</p>
<p><br/>Eridan scoffs, rubbing his finger on his cheek absentmindedly. At least he was smiling a little, and although the scent of nicotine was more than a little heavy, a certain lightness had settled in his eyes. Sollux supposes he needed some time alone, or with close friends to speak about it. He could almost physically feel the cloud of strong emotions mixing with smoke around him.</p>
<p><br/>The officer looked positively out of it. Unlike Sollux would have expected, he was not rapid firing hypothesises and plans of actions, nor was he stupidly adamant to go start searching right this second. There was something in his entire demeanour which seemed as if it were disconnected from the world. From the hazy blur in his eyes, he guesses the other had given up on this case way too long ago. He could not relate, but god must that feel weird.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>“Hey, ED,” if Eridan dislikes the nickname, he says nothing, “d’you wanna like meet up tonight after my shift to talk about it ? I think you need a little time to process all this shit, and to think about what this message could mean, and meanwhile I'll get Meenah to give me the intel she already has.” </p>
<p><br/>“It's true I am on the clock right now...I should go.” He fumbles around his pockets a bit, eyes still a bit lost, before pulling his phone out and opening the contacts app. “Put your name in. What time does your shift end ?”</p>
<p><br/>“Wow, you want my number ? Going a little fast there huh ? You don’t even know my favourite colour yet.”</p>
<p><br/>His eyes harden, finally focusing on something. “Very funny.”</p>
<p><br/>Sollux snorts, typing his number anyways. He was just joking, right ? No way he'd even fathom getting in a relationship with this guy who clearly did not have his shit together. Fine, he did look...handsome enough, but that was it. There were plenty other handsome people to pick around him. And besides, Eridan was probably as straight as a ruler.</p>
<p><br/>(Though his light eyeliner begged to disagree. Sollux had obviously noticed that. It was pretty discrete, but really nice. Maybe he would compliment it one day.)</p>
<p> </p>
<p><br/>Once he is done, he hands the phone back to the Ampora without second thoughts. “My shift ends at seven today, and I know a cool coffee shop downtown; we could grab something and talk casually about it.”</p>
<p><br/>“This sounds awfully like a date, Sol, hm ? Going a little fast there, aren't you ?”</p>
<p><br/>If Eridan's smirk along his very nice and silky tone makes his heart squeeze like in some sort of cheesy rom-com movie Karkat would watch, he ignores it. Well, it was almost better to see him like this than when he was borderline hyperventilating. He grins back. “Ha. Ha.”</p>
<p><br/>“Alright, I'll be on my way then,” the guy says, chucking his cigarette in the trash with a snobby flick of his wrist (which looked a little hesitant still, Sollux remarks), “and Sollux ? Thank you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He considers the uniformed officer in front of him. His voice had dropped in intensity in the end, and there was something very soft an genuine in his last words which somehow touched the detective in a particular way. As he did not especially like getting in touch with victims and their families, instead doing his work from behind the front lines, Sollux was not habituated to the such true, absolute gratefulness. It was awkward, but not totally bad, he realizes.</p>
<p><br/>“Aw, man, don't say that—I didn’t do shit yet. Keep your thanks for when we find your bro, okay ?” he says instead of anything else, shaking his hands in front of him. Eridan gives him one last almost bittersweet smile (do not think about how delicately the corner of his mouth twitched up do not think about it) before completely turning around to go back inside the compound.</p>
<p><br/>Sollux links his arms behind his back, a little lonely now, sighing to the sky. What was he getting himself into ? A three year old frozen case which even their best detective could not solve was popping up again, and the victim's brother had personally come to him for help. Also, he was kind of hot. That was always a plus. </p>
<p><br/>After a few seconds, he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket, and pulls it out. A little smile settles on his lips as he sees the notification light up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>&gt;&gt;7pm ill come get you from your desk</em>
  <br/>
  <em>&gt;&gt;wwe can go wwherever you wwant</em>
  <br/>
  <em>&gt;&gt;except if its like a really shitty place then ill havve to take control</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>&gt;&gt;You don't tru2t my ta2te ? ii'm hurt.</strong>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>&gt;&gt;youre karkats friend obvviously i dont trust your taste</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <strong>&gt;&gt;2o are you though.</strong>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <em>√√ read at 7:54 A.M.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>fun fact : one day, aradia put something in the fridge labeled "d0 n0t eat" and sollux ate it and ended up falling sick for a week because it was not. food.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>next chapter you can have a little davekat as a treat :) hope you enjoyed !</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. keeping up with the vantases</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Karkat and Dave are just taking it easy.</p><p> </p><p>Kankri is taking it...less easy than usual.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>yes, i wrote 3k of davekat fluff which has like 0.001% to do with the plot. u cant stop me!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>He remembers foggy mornings and the sound of rain against the windows. Not that he disliked rain; it was a natural phenomenon which, when brought in good quantity, was very good for earth. He liked the rain quite a bit. And not only for its environmental imprint.</em>
</p><p><br/>
<em>He remembers waking up early, as always, and feeling very good. There was something different, almost dream-like in being under the covers while it rained outside. Something in this feeling that was being safe under a roof and warm in a bed brought him the simplest form of happiness. It was during these mornings that he truly felt grateful for the life he had.</em>
</p><p><br/>
<em>And of course, he remembers the weight against him. Not only the blankets—something warmer, something alive. An arm loose around his waist. A heart steadily beating against his ear. A pair of lips against his forehead. Fingers brushing lazily through his hair...</em>
</p><p><br/>
<em>A voice. A very specific voice, belonging to one person and one person only. He always found it extraordinary, how in this enormous world, only one single individual had been capable of giving him all of these things simultaneously, and so much more. A miracle. <strong>He</strong> thought this was funny. <strong>He</strong> thought that many things were funny. <strong>He</strong> made so many things become funny.</em>
</p><p><br/>
<em>Now, he keeps on waking up, because he is still alive and nothing stops him from opening his eyes every morning. Except there is no arm, no heartbeat, no lips, no hand. There is no whistled tune while he prepares himself breakfast. There is nobody to tell him “Good bye, see you tonight.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p><br/>
<em>There is nobody to tell him “I love you.”</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
<em>There is nobody.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
“So what did that loser say ?”</p><p><br/>
“Well he made me listen to the voice message, first of all, and...it was...weird, kar.”</p><p><br/>
Karkat scrunches up his nose, shifting on the mattress. “I mean yeah, obviously. You didn’t hear anything about Cronus in what ? Three years ? Must have been a shock.”</p><p><br/>
He hears Eridan sigh behind the receiver, and can imagine him sitting at his desk, phone in one hand and pen in the other. “Sure was. But...I don't know. I didn't immediately start yellin or anythin I kinda just...y'know, did that thin when I don't feel shit anymore for a while.”</p><p><br/>
“Oh, shit. I guess it's okay though, like, you must have been confused on what you had to be feeling about it, so you just didn’t feel at all.” When the other does not answer, he slightly worries. “I’m no therapist, man, I dunno.”</p><p><br/>
“No, no, maybe you're right. It's just...well, I usually like talkin about myself and stuff, but right now I don't know, you know ? I don't have any idea of what I have to say about it. Sure, I want to see Cronus again, and this is definitely great, but also...it's been so long, and that voice message was not super clear.”</p><p><br/>
A hand is put on his shoulder, and he feels Dave reach up to poke his cheek impatiently. He whispers a hushed insult, hearing Eridan sigh, then turns back to his phone. “I think you're doing pretty well right now, you're not crying or anything so that's good. </p><p> </p><p><br/>
“I guess ?”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Don't get your hopes up or you'll end up crushed on the floor even more depressed than you are right now—and that's fucking saying something.”</p><p><br/>
Eridan gives him the smallest laugh. Better than nothing.</p><p><br/>
“Now go back to your shift and save all you feely thingy for sol; dude looooves hearing about that.” He scoffs. “But really, if you need anything else later, text me okay ? Or talk to Fef ? Just—don’t stay all alone with your cringy sad thoughts.”</p><p><br/>
“Okay mom, sorry for botherin” Karkat immediately opens his mouth for a rude remark, but is cut short before he can. “No seriously though. I appreciate it. Have fun with Dave and say hi for me.”</p><p><br/>
The line goes blank. Fucking Eridan Ampora and his fucking theatrics. The dude would not let someone hang up on him even if he was letting out his dying breath, and it pissed Karkat off very much. Even though he knew it was just a habit, and did not mean he was rushing to the end of a conversation in an impolite way, it still pissed him off. He groans, throwing his phone across the bed, before angrily muttering in his palms.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Woa there,” he feels Dave pushing himself on his elbows, the bed shifting under his weight. And right after that, he feels his fiancee's full strength on him, letting out a yelp as the air is pushed out of his lungs. He waves his arms in the air pointlessly and quickly gives up, slumping back down with Dave’s torso pressed against his.</p><p><br/>
He waits a few more seconds to emphasize how displeased he was at the sudden gesture, then gives in and wraps his arms around the other. His blonde hair was brushing against his nose, and Karkat breathes in the familiar scent of stupid cinnamon shampoo Dave loved so much. He said he liked to ‘smell like a snack’. So stupid.</p><p><br/>
But as he feels the gentle rhythm of Dave's heartbeat against his chest, he cannot repress a terrible sense of relief slipping over him. He was alive. He was back. And he still smelled like a snack.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Can’t a man pounce on his fiancee just because he wants to ?” said blonde dramatically declares, almost hitting Karkat's nose as he raises his head. He is grinning like a fool. An absolute fucking idiot.</p><p><br/>
“At least tell me first, you almost knocked me out there !”</p><p><br/>
“Karkitty, love of my life, it wouldn’t be as fun if you knew when I was going to pounce on you.” He rambles, shaking his head as he spoke. “Because the whole point of a full body pounce is to surprise the pounce-ed with the full strength of your love.”</p><p><br/>
A laugh bubbles in his throat, and he forces a hand on his mouth to suppress from actually giggling like some lovestruck high-school girl. “And here I was, hoping your time undercover would have given you at least one more braincell.”</p><p><br/>
“Nuh-uh. My body rejects extra braincells like a lesbian rejects men. Trust me, I already have a good lifetime supply, and do not require any more.”</p><p><br/>
“I wouldn’t be so sure of that...” he rolls his eyes, but there is no real annoyance behind it. Dave makes a big shit eating grin, plummeting back down with a happy sigh. Honestly, Karkat is conflicted between pushing him off because even if he did not have to go to work today he still liked to maintain a certain routine; and letting him lay there and wait for hours until hunger forced them both out of bed. His subconscious almost immediately tries to go for the former, but all his muscles long for the latter.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Yesterday had been one hell of a ride. He can still feel the aftermath of the pure rush of adrenalin which had got him to run like a rabbit on steroids and not even stop when punched square in the face. Said aftermath was kind of like being hungover minus the splitting headache. So...he was basically exhausted. Part of him wants to curl up under the blankets with Dave and stay there where it was safe and quiet and smelled like cinnamon. Another part of him (which sounded a lot like Kankri) tells him that this was childish and ridiculous and that Dave would get tired of his clinginess.</p><p><br/>
But fuck that part. All his limbs feel more like logs of wood than actual flesh, and he was sleepy. The only reason why he had woken up was Eridan calling him about the new lead, and now that he had given his pep talk he could go straight back to cuddling with his fiancee without a care in the world.</p><p><br/>
Except. Of course he had to think of stupid Eridan and his stupid brother. When he had told him that yesterday was that brother's birthday, he had genuinely felt like an asshole because he had been so wrapped up in the happiness of seeing Dave again that he just completely forgot everything else. Since he had never been really close to Cronus, his whole disappearance act and stuff had not affected him more than that, he supposes the only thing that had changed had been Kankri.</p><p><br/>
His brother, who he loved very much (sometimes), had not appreciated having his boyfriend gone all of a sudden. The guy was socially incompetent, so finding someone who tolerated him enough to start a relationship with him had actually been an big shock to him. And obviously, when while the two had been starting to settle together and plan things Cronus suddenly disappeared...it had been an even bigger shock.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
It makes Karkat wonder what he would have done if for some reason Dave had not been able to come back from the undercover mission. And just as quickly, he does not want to wonder about it. Because waking up all alone in their empty flat for three months straight had been objectively the worst time of his life. When he did domestic things he used to do with Dave, it felt hollow, and unsettling, and he found himself desperately searching for distractions and other stuff to make him forget how lonely and pathetic he was.</p><p><br/>
So, he decides, he never wants to think about that ever again. Never wants to think about the possibility of losing that feeling of pure plain happiness he had when just being around Dave. And he makes a grimace. Gosh, this was turning him soft.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Kaaaarkaaaat” he rolls his eyes. Wow, this was the man he was becoming soft for ? “I’m hungry.”</p><p><br/>
“Then get up. There must be some leftovers in the fridge or something, I dunno.”</p><p><br/>
Dave groans. “I’m too lazy...I can't feel my legs, babe, I think I've used them too much and now they're leaving me. Is this karma ? What if my legs never come back. Will you still love me even if I don't have legs ?”</p><p><br/>
“No Dave, the only thing I like about you are your beautiful sculpted legs, and if they leave, I’ll be going with them.” The blonde raises his head, flushed with fake indignation. “Just joking. I like your face too.”</p><p><br/>
“You like my face ? You really do ?”</p><p><br/>
“Yeah.” he cannot suppress a smile as the other giddily grins. “I love your stupid face.”</p><p><br/>
Dave’s eyes glow for a moment, chestnut brown reflecting the cold winter light coming from the window. Then, he closes them, leaning for a casual kiss—the kind which they exchanged so simply at any given time, which were just long enough, and which left them both with a nice fuzzy feeling in their cheeks. When he pulls away, Karkat more than ever feels ridiculously thankful to have him here.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Kinda missed you for three months.” He mumbles. The other laughs good-naturedly, cupping his cheek with his palm.</p><p><br/>
“Aw, Karkat, I missed you too. I'm really glad to be back, like...those three months were not a nightmare but god it was lonely. I thought a few times about ditching it all to come back home, but I didn't cause I mean ruining the whole thing just because I wanted to kiss you would've been pretty dumb.” His voice gradually quickens, and at the end he pulls his hand back to his lap, looking terribly ashamed. “Anyways.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Dave, we are engaged.” He sighs, incredulously rubbing his eye. “It’s not weird or embarrassing for you to tell me stuff like this. For what it’s worth, I still think you're cool.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
The blonde gives him a tentative smile. “Yeah okay. Sorry for that. I just...I love you a lot. And I feel stupid for not being capable of saying it properly because I’m emotionally stunted and more awkward than a baby in the middle of an orgy.” He winces. “Sorry for that mental image.”</p><p><br/>
“Apology accepted and it's fine. I love you too, even if you aren't capable of talking about your true deep feelings without including some weird metaphor or getting all flustered.”</p><p><br/>
They look at each other without a word for a few seconds, contemplating both the weird baby metaphor and their feelings, and coming to a mutual quiet agreement like they always did that everything was fine. They were together right now, and they were neither injured nor dying, so everything was fine. But Karkat notices that he was starting to feel hungry.</p><p><br/>
He yawns. “Anyways, could you please make something for breakfast ? I'm tired of having to cook all by myself all the time.”</p><p><br/>
“I’m pretty sure you mostly ate either takeout or called your friends for help.” Dave immediately deadpans, raising an eyebrow. “But okay. I kinda missed cooking anyways.”</p><p><br/>
“Don't burn the kitchen !” he shouts as the other gets out of the bedroom, simply shooting back some word of agreement along with other nonsense, and Karkat supposes he was back to talk to himself or create some sick rap out of nowhere for fun. It was good to have that noise back in the house—he was getting real tired of the background TV he used to switch on whenever he was lonely, and the radio never played the sort of comforting tunes Dave liked to whistle for fun.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
He stays laying in the bed for a few more minutes, alone but in a different way because he knew his fiancee was right there in the kitchen next door. In fact, he could even hear him switching on the stove already, rummaging through the fridge and cupboards for something Karkat had left.</p><p><br/>
Eventually, he pulls himself from under the covers and stretches out, satisfyingly listening to all his joints crack one by one as he did. His body still felt a little rusty from the fight, and sleepiness persisted in his brain but it was not that bad. He slips on a shirt and some sweatpants, not bothering for more, because he was definitely not planning on going anywhere today other than his couch and Dave’s lap. Of course, he always let his phone on for eventual emergencies in the compound and genuinely hoped they would not lose their shits without him.</p><p><br/>
He checks his phone for notifications anyways, always curious. There was a little ‘thanks’ from Eridan, and some other messages from various people in the compound wishing him a good free day. Even Dave's brother, the big boss Strider, had left him a congratulation and a ‘don’t be too rough with my lovely baby brother'. That guy never changed.</p><p><br/>
As he walks into the living room connected to the kitchen he flashes a drowsy smile to Dave who was very focused on perfectly nailing scrambled eggs, and sinks into the couch. The house smelled good and warm. He missed that.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Karkat almost does not hear the first knock. It is only when he notices the blonde curiously turn his head towards the door that he realizes that someone was knocking, asking to enter. He gets up, shrugging in confusion, and unlocks it without much of a second thought.</p><p><br/>
“Oh, bro, hey,” he blinks, surprised, when he sees said big brother standing very straight as always on the doormat. “Isn’t it kinda early ?”</p><p><br/>
“Apologies, uh, I did not think you would consider 8AM as particularly early since you usually are at work around 7:30AM. But if I am disturbing anything, I will leave immediately, of course.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Kankri was polite as always, but Karkat does not miss the faint and definitely abnormal stutter in his voice. “No it's cool, come in ?”</p><p><br/>
“Thank you. I have brought some things in case you did not eat breakfast yet. I just...wished to check on you and Dave before I went to work.” Again, he stutters. The younger Vantas narrows his eyes, exchanging a glance with Dave who seemingly had caught up as fast as he had.</p><p><br/>
But he decides not to immediately comment on it. “Sure, thanks for the food,” he takes the bag given to him, carrying it to the kitchen, “you don't have any classes today ?”</p><p><br/>
“Oh, I do, but the first one starts at 9:30AM and therefore I have more than enough time to get to it. The university is not far, plus the students never all show up on time.”</p><p><br/>
His words were clear cut and curt as always, but Karkat felt something very wrong in them today, and he had no idea why. He supposed Kankri, in his usual in-your-face fashion, would have come clean and told him everything from the start...but he had not, for some reason. As he sits down in their sofa, eyes falling to the ground, the smaller Vantas frowns.</p><p><br/>
“Hey, what's up with him ?” Dave whispers, covered by the sound of oil bubbling on the pan. Karkat shrugs.</p><p><br/>
“I literally have no idea. Maybe he is really just here to check up. I haven’t sent him any message in a while, and it’s true he was here for me a lot for the last months.” The blonde one only reacts with a thoughtful hum, his attention falling back to the eggs on the pan. He also snatches a quick look at the contents of Kankri's bags, hungrily eyeing them, and so the other decides to take care of his own big brother by himself.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
How hard could it be ? Kankri never ever lied.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
He sits down in the sofa next to him, observing as he almost imperceptibly curled his fingers harder into his sweater. “So, we're doing good, Dave's back and we're taking like two three days off to celebrate.” He leans his back in the seat, not taking his eyes off his brother. “How about you ?”</p><p><br/>
“I...” Kankri opens his mouth, then closes it, uncharacteristically at a loss for words. “I suppose I have been...doing...as good as one can in these times ?”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“That's not a very good answer.”</p><p><br/>
The older one sighs dejectedly. “I guess it was not.” But does not elaborate.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
This evasive tone was starting to get on Karkat's nerves. As much as he usually hated holding the other's strong gaze, he was now starting to hate having to actively search for it as it fixed itself anxiously to the floor.</p><p><br/>
“Ugh, honestly,” he finally sighs, making Kankri raise his head with almost comically wide eyes, “how did I somehow manage to get stuck with the world's most emotionally stunted men ? Come here.”</p><p><br/>
Before the eldest has time to protest, he shifts on the couch to grab his shoulders and (a bit forcefully) pull him into what was probably the weirdest bro hug ever seen. Karkat was awesome at hugs, he knew that, but Kankri could be capable of mistaking someone strangling him as a hug—and that was an understatement. The latter actually stays frozen for a few seconds, and Karkat knows he was racking his brains over the best position he could put his arms around him in but was ultimately just making it more awkward.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Then, he does the last thing anyone had ever expected him to do.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
He lets out the tiniest, most quiet sob Karkat had ever heard.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>His hands eventually slowly crumple down to grab at the hems of his brother's shirt, and his entire body follows the same kind of withering motion as his spine curls up on itself. It was now the younger one's turn to be left frozen, only barely reaching out and adjusting his position in order to let the other hide his head between his arms. The most terrifying thing, Karkat realizes, was the absolute silence which just stayed hanging as his big brother broke down in front of him.</p><p><br/>
There is neither a loud sob, nor an ear splitting cry. Only a very soft whine emerging from the pit of Kankri's stomach, barely loud enough for him to hear. He had become so tiny, all of a sudden. Not annoying or loud about some random academic bullshit, just... As if he simply wanted to curl up on himself so tightly he would become small enough that the world could forget him and move on.</p><p><br/>
“Hey,” he finds himself struggling to speak, swallowing down something thick, “hey, bro. What's going on ?”</p><p><br/>
He does not actually expect his brother to answer, but he tries to, letting out a string of messy words and hiccups resembling a sort of apology and “I don't know.” It was incredibly disturbing, seeing his older brother who always had his shit under control at all times just suddenly shatter in a hug. The lump in his throat only grows as he feels Kankri faintly shuddering about something, shrinking even further.</p><p><br/>
Eventually once Karkat has managed to bring him as close as possible, pushing his nose in his brother's hair and wrapping his arm even tighter around him due to some irrational fear that he would just slip away and disappear, Kankri manages to start breathing properly again. Karkat realizes how cold he was against him—how cold he was compared to Dave (who had respectfully and a little awkwardly let them do their Vantas thing). </p><p><br/>
“I am...so...genuinely...  sorry, Karkat.” He whispers, and it is clear how little he trusted his voice at the moment. “I just...I felt...so lonely all of a sudden and...I could not breathe...I—"</p><p><br/>
“It’s fine. Fuck, Kankri, I'm sorry you have to deal with this. I really am. And I...don't exactly know what I can do but I’ll be there, if that's enough for you.”</p><p><br/>
He distinctly hears him take a sharp breath, forcing out an unhappy laugh. “Yes...being there for me. I suppose...that is all I need.”</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>bonus fact : the university kankri teaches at is also where he studied, annnd the place where he met cronus :)</p><p> </p><p>Tune in next chapter for actual plot development ? Maybe ? Hope you enjoyed, and thank you so much for your kind comments !! They motivate me :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. unfinished melody of old times</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It's the end of a long work day and all Eridan wants is hopeful information on his brother's case.</p><p>He will get more than he bargained for (in a good and bad sense).</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'll probably continue updating once every two weeks; with everything that has been going on right now I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed and burning out. I have another chapter ready, but after that...well, we will see</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for sticking, and reading this ! I will do my best :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>At seven p.m. sharp, he shows up at Sollux's desk, and is not surprised when finding it empty.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
He had pegged the guy as kind of aloof, and definitely the type to not really give a shit about time and apparently he had been right in his assumption. It was a little awkward, standing in normal clothing in the police compound, but most of the people on this floor (which included most detectives and a few other tech workers) were dressed casually as well. He feels out of place anyways; the uniformed officers did work with the detectives most of the time but they never really ‘mingled’ up on their floor.</p><p><br/>
His phone displays 7:04p.m., and he sighs heavily, sitting down on the chair he had used the same morning. He supposes he could make himself comfortable since Sollux was definitely going to be more than a little late, so he flicks his message app on to pester Karkat a bit while waiting. But he finds himself at a loss for what to tell him, staring at the last conversation they had had, and eventually shoved his phone back in his pocket with a huff.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
This day had been...a little weird. After the intervention from last night, all of them had a lot of administrative papers to catch up on, and thankfully their patrols had been taken over by other officers who were not involved in the whole fiasco. Eridan was okay at paperwork, he considered himself efficient enough, but his mind had been elsewhere the whole time.</p><p><br/>
That fucking voice mail. The voice. There was no mistaking it, he told himself; this was Cronus speaking. Or...maybe it was not ? This whole stupid game of mental ping pong had ended up giving him the worst type of migraine. He had spoken to Karkat about it, obviously, but the guy had not been of much help either—though he was very supportive as always. Eridan does not know what kind of help he expected when he himself had absolutely no idea what he was asking help for. </p><p><br/>
He hated this situation. His brother always had a knack for pissing him off just by existing, and even when he was gone he continued to annoy him. Maybe this was not the best way of thinking about it, though. It had been three full years and a few more months or so since Cronus had not given any sign of life, and now this message all of a sudden...It was almost dramatically comical. Right out of some twisted thriller.</p><p><br/>
Cronus had probably gotten himself in trouble, entangled in something so much bigger than himself; as he so often used to. From the few words in the voice message, it was pretty easy to infer that he had been tricked into paying a debt too big for him, and was getting himself deeper and deeper into shit as he went. It was still confusing, though; if he had been involved with underground illegal activities, the compound would have at least noticed a few leads in three years, right ?</p><p><br/>
So how come it seemed as if he had managed to gather a big sum of money already, without their father's fortune (Eridan was smart enough to always go through the Ampora spending record just to check if maybe Cronus pulled out money or something) and without ever being found by the police ? He was not smart enough to come with such a long lasting plan by himself. And that fact was more than a little upsetting since it meant something, or someone, was pulling the strings of all this bullshit.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
From the corner of his eye, Eridan notices some detectives of the compound packing their things to go home. Gosh, he had had the voicemail in repeat in his brain for the entirety of the day, and even now, the voice echoed back and forth through his head. It was starting to get awfully repetitive, and awfully lonely as well, and he pulls his phone out of his pocket again (7:13p.m., what was Sollux even doing ?) now determined to advance in the case.</p><p><br/>
“Oh, Ampora !” a voice calls him before he has the time to start typing, and he raises his head to meet a pair of familiar fuchsia glasses.</p><p><br/>
“Sergeant Meenah, hey.” He does not even force a smile, simply waving as she takes Sollux's seat in front of him with a proud glint in her eyes from the title. She was one of the youngest to ace the sergeant exam, and was more than happy to flaunt about that fact.</p><p><br/>
“Fancy seeing you around ! Especially at Sol’s desk.” She beams, showing sharp teeth. “What brought you up here ?”</p><p><br/>
“You don't know ?”</p><p><br/>
She makes a face. “Naw. I should ?”</p><p><br/>
“I supposed Captor would have told you about the lead that popped up on my brother's case...”</p><p><br/>
“Oh, that.” Eridan is taken aback at her disinterested reaction. She simply shrugs, passing her tongue over her lips absentmindedly. “Hm, he did tell me about it. But it's no-fin, really. Just a dead end.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“What do you mean ?”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“I mean, what are you gonna do with that voicemail ? I already knew what was going on three years ago, and this is not bringing the case anywhere. I guess at the very least it confirms that the bastard is alive, and that's not even sure. Maybe he's dead now. He sounded pretty pissed.”</p><p><br/>
Something very cold and ugly and familiar starts climbing from the very bottom of his stomach and up his throat. “So what ?” his ears are ringing. “You don't even have the fuckin decency to go find his corpse after all this time ? He doesn’t deserve it ?”</p><p><br/>
“Woah, chill, you know that's not what I meant,” but by her tone, he knows it is very precisely what she had meant, “I’m just saying, three years passed and I'm mature enough to accept when things are over. Unlike Kankri.” </p><p> </p><p><br/>
(how dare she talk about Kankri as if he was blowing this out of proportion. Cronus had been saving up for an engagement ring for months before he disappeared, and Eridan knew how important this was for him and) </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
“I thought you were his friend.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Once again, she shrugs in a way that makes Eridan want to punch her. “That was three years ago. He's been on his own for long enough, and if he ever comes back, it'll probably be his choice and not ours.”</p><p><br/>
“He sounded in trouble, and you know it as well as I do.” He snaps, a little more aggressively than socially acceptable. But he could not care less, even when her eyes narrow dangerously.</p><p><br/>
“He’s been in trouble for three years, dude. Don't you think it's time to accept that you can't save him anymore ?”</p><p><br/>
“We can still save him !” an impulse of pure rage strikes him and he gets up, slamming his palms down loudly on the desk. She follows, getting up as well and baring her teeth like some sort of animal.</p><p><br/>
“It’s been <em>three years</em>, Eridan ! There is a reason why his case is frozen ! There is a reason why your dad refuses to acknowledge he ever fucking existed to begin with ! So just get over it already !”</p><p><br/>
All of her words were true, were they not ? She was right. She was completely right, and for once, saying something logical and reasonable. But he hates how bitter that reality sounded, and hates the way her sentences are shooting holes in his body, and hates that he was wrong. Yet, a voice in the very back of his mind, pulling his spine up and straight, is yelling and yelling that she was WRONG and that Cronus was here SOMEWHERE and that he could FIND HIM.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
Three years was a long time, though...</p><p> </p><p>He slumps back down on his chair without a word, bringing his hands to his face. He cannot see it, but he knows Meenah is victoriously towering over him with that disgusting grin of hers, though he cannot bring himself to argue with her right now. He just cannot. His head hurts, and his throat is boiling, and he just croaks a pathetic “Go away, I don't want to talk to you anymore”. It would satisfy her, knowing she had won the argument.</p><p><br/>
And she leaves him alone indeed, happy with her harsh words. And just like that, Eridan is all alone again, drowning in his own blurry thoughts. Karkat had told him to call if he ever felt bad again but...he is not even sure if he can talk right now. The exhaustion from last night, the useless voice message, his childish wish to hang on to something that was gone...everything catches up to him so fast. Fuck Meenah. </p><p><br/>
He feels like he was just ran over by a truck. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe he should send Sollux a message and leave and go back home to sleep for the next days. Maybe he should never wake up. There is bile bubbling in his throat. <em>Fuck Meenah.</em></p><p> </p><p><br/>
Suddenly, he hears quickly shuffling feet, and someone throws themselves on the chair in front of him—he knows it, because a sound of rolling chair wheels on the ground hits his ears. Right after that, that someone starts typing on the computer as fast as humanly possible.</p><p><br/>
He dares open an eye, meeting a lanky figure hunched over the desk and fingers flying over the keyboard manically. He blinks. “Sollux ?”</p><p><br/>
“Huh—oh ! Didn't see you there, ED.” The man distantly answers, only barely glancing up to him to assert his identity. One of his wrists slides over to the side, grabbing his mouse to roll it over the mat in a shaky motion. “Sorry for being late. I found something suuuuper important and like had to talk to big boss Strider about it and now I'm reanalysing the voice message...oh fuuuuck Ampora, you are gonna looove this.”</p><p><br/>
The dirty blonde haired man is speaking way too fast for Eridan to properly follow. His head still feels a little underwater, and he pinches the bridge of his nose in an attempt to pull himself back to reality—it is a little useless. All because of Meenah fucking Peixes, he is back to his weird position floating above his body, only barely understanding the words Sollux was rapid firing at him. He forces himself to grab onto them anyways, because the guy was doing this for <em>him</em>, and he was maybe kinda nice, and did not deserve to be ignored like that.</p><p><br/>
They had just met this morning, and yet Sollux had already seen him having two mental breakdowns in a single day. Wow, good job Eridan. Doing great.</p><p> </p><p>“What are...you doing ?” he eventually asks, when the other falls quiet for a while. His face was entirely scrunched up around his weirdly bicoloured glasses, lower lip pushing itself to some kind of very concentrated half-pout. Focusing on stupid details like these helped coming back to reality as well, and observing Sollux was oddly therapeutic....in a non creepy way.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“See, I was going through the voice file once more, and I kinda realized I could analyse it a bit more in detail to get a better quality. Like, not access the other part of the conversation but...getting this one in higher resolution, y'know ? Maybe we’ll get some background noise to pinpoint where he was, because we couldn't trace the localisation otherwise.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
More than half of these words fly over Eridan's head. “Huh.”</p><p><br/>
“Are you even listening ? Ugh anyways.” He notices a faint lisp as the other pronounced his words, who promptly throws his head backwards to get a satisfying crack. “All I've got for now is some very light background tune. Better than nothing anyways. Wanna hear ?”</p><p><br/>
“Sure, why not.”</p><p><br/>
“Wow dude, you really need a nap.” Sollux laughs, pulling his earbuds out of his pocket just as he had done this morning before handing them over to Eridan. He accepts them, a little hesitant, Meenah's words hazily floating in his brain.</p><p><br/>
Pointless. This would just be a random song, which would mean nothing, and they would be back to square one. Before he even starts hearing the tune, he has already given up, because that was the most reasonable thing to do. Don't get your hopes up, or you'll end up crushed on the floor. Yeah. He wonders how Kankri would have felt.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
That is, until Sollux presses play.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He knew this song. He knew this tune. His heart speeds up all of a sudden as the all too familiar notes dig themselves in his head, dancing around in a way he had not felt in three full years. Mere seconds in, his heartbeat is going too fast and his chest hurts so bad he cannot breathe anymore, but he knew this song. He remembers.</p><p><br/>
“S-Sollux, this,” his eyes are wide and oh god, <em>he remembers</em>, “I know this song. I—”</p><p><br/>
“Well that's fucking great, because our systems don't, and I was kinda pissed.” his eyebrows furrow. “But how do you know this tune if it doesn’t exist ?”</p><p><br/>
He painfully swallows as his mind automatically continues the music in his ears even once the recording stops, “Because my brother wrote it. Cronus wrote this song—but he never published it or anything—he—"</p><p><br/>
“Ooookay !! Great, keep those leads coming !” his mouth twitches up in a proud smile which sends sparks right inside Eridan's already pounding chest. He is short of breath but oh god, his head is ringing and putting the tune on repeat, almost hearing Cronus whistle it and ask him about his opinion on it and</p><p><br/>
“He...he wrote it for a friend of ours a while back, I remember it because it was for her birthday...” Sollux follows his words with care, nodding along, “And...that song...I think...shit, it had a name !”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Can you remember it ?”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Fuck ! I'm trying !” he nervously passes a hand through his hair, cringing as he feels it slide between his fingers. “I know it was for Porrim...for her bar...and it had a weird name because she liked uh...was it Greek or Roman mythology ?”</p><p><br/>
Sollux opens a tab of notes on his computer as Eridan groans in one of his palms, keeping on rubbing his head with his other hand. “Porrim...a bar...could you be more precise ?”</p><p><br/>
“Yeah, shit, sorry, it's Porrim Maryam and her bar...what day are we ?”</p><p><br/>
“6th of February ?” he blinks.</p><p><br/>
“No no, week day.”</p><p><br/>
“Ah right,” his eyes slide to the corner of the screen while typing the woman's full name. “Uhhh Tuesday.”</p><p><br/>
Eridan sighs, frowning. “Her bar only opens from Wednesday night to Sunday...I think she also owns a sewing shop but I have no idea where it is. Anyways, it's a bar a little downtown, close to the docks, not very popular but still nice atmosphere.”</p><p><br/>
“All of this advertisement is cool, but what's its name ?” </p><p><br/>
“The Virgo, I think. Virgin. Surprising, considering so many people fuck there.”</p><p><br/>
Sollux raises an eyebrow. “Okay, I guess we're gonna have to check it out. I'm still curious though, if she plays that song often, we must have put it in the record.”</p><p><br/>
“Yeah well,” a bitter smile forces the corners of his lips, “he never finished it. What you heard was just the base instrumental gimmick. He was working on it when he disappeared.”</p><p><br/>
“Talk about never finishing work you start...” Eridan can feel him rolling his eyes behind his glasses, and accords him a sharp laugh to show he half-appreciated the humour. They were getting clues, his mind finally catches up after a few seconds while waiting for Sollux to type and search details on the bar and Porrim Maryam. This was getting somewhere. Meenah was fucking wrong. Part of him wants to call her just to piss her off and feel satisfied, but he decides otherwise. She did not even deserve his attention.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
As he thinks a little more about the song, his chest starts easing up. If there was one thing Cronus knew how to not fuck up, it was music. With perfect pitch and a sense of aesthetic which was way too developed for someone who looked like a rip-off John Travolta, his brother was surprisingly good at composing tunes befitting of people. In fact, this start of a scrapped off sheet of music he had begun for Porrim had been one of his best, according to Eridan, because it just felt...like her. He does not know how exactly, but it did.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Eros’ lamentation.” </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Hm ?”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
“Eros’ lamentation.” He grins, meeting Sollux' confused expression. “That’s the cheesy name of this work in progress. He called it like that because Porrim's a lesbian, and a fuckton of drunk guys get rejected by her on a daily basis.” </p><p><br/>
If the amused smile the detective gives him back kind of sends little bubbles popping in his head, Eridan does not comment on it. “Shit. That's kind of a good name, actually.”</p><p><br/>
“Don’t tell me you're a nerd like him...”</p><p><br/>
“Shut up. At least I can appreciate good lore for a song.” He replies just as fast, keyboard clicking under his nimble fingers. The other sneaks a peak, reading up the unattached notes jotted down on the word file with the name ‘ampora’. </p><p><br/>
As he watches him write down a few additional general facts from the intel gathered three years ago and other stuff Eridan already knew, he thinks. “Say, is it alright for you to investigate this case again ? Since it's frozen and all..”</p><p><br/>
Sollux seems way too happy when the subject is brought up, and the corner of his mouth quirks up in a smirk. “Frozen ? No no no, Cronus Ampora's case isn’t frozen, my dear ED. It has been very much brought back to life by the one and only.” At that he huffs his chest, looking a little ridiculous, and hits it with his fist with the confidence of a thousand Karkats.</p><p><br/>
“I....I'm impressed. Really. Didn’t think Strider would just let you get back on it so easily. With my father's pressure and Meenah's reluctance...”</p><p><br/>
“Don’t sweat it. Dirk is a cool guy, plus he knows the extent of my genius. If anyone can solve this case, that's me. Fuck Peixes, and fuck your dad.”</p><p><br/>
An incredulous but warm feeling settles on his face. “Yeah. Fuck her.” He pauses then, a pitiful thought itching the back of his head before he manages to speak again. “And fuck him too.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Sollux makes an appreciative hum, drawn back to the contents of his file. With the crude light reflecting off his stupid glasses, Eridan can almost make out the outlines of his hidden almond shaped eyes which were flickering from side to side, occasionally blinking. Something in the way his fingers curl up tightly around his mouse makes the officer realize how terrible his position was—seriously, the guy's spine looked more like a question mark than a spine. Plus, he had probably been working here all day.</p><p><br/>
Then again, Eridan had been working all day as well, and his own back ached from being seated at a desk for too long. If Cronus was here, he would have patted his shoulder, then given that trademark crooked grin, before asking him where he wanted to buy takeout from for tonight. They both did not like cooking, though the youngest Ampora was distinctly better at it than the eldest, and so most of the time they would scroll through endless lists of restaurants before picking something new or normal depending on their moods.</p><p><br/>
He remembers when a few weeks before his disappearance, they had bought Indian food. While they both complained about the spices and bickered on their poor life choices, Cronus had brought up the topic of that tune he was composing for Porrim. He had tried singing it, but his throat was burning due to the spices and ended up choking on his saliva halfway through his performance. That night, Eridan had drank more mango scented milk than he ever had in his whole life, and he had also helped him find the name for that song—Cronus was more than a little lost when it came to mythology, and it was too late to disturb Kankri about it. They had furiously googled details and made fun of Ancient Greek porn until they realized it was like 3a.m. and finally clocked out.</p><p><br/>
Eridan had woken up the next morning on the sofa, with his phone plastered on his face and Cronus sleeping head on the ground and feet up on the cushions. Kankri had called just then, and he had picked up, before sending him pictures of his brother probably killing his neck in that position. The Vantas had shown up fuming at their house mere minutes later. It had been one of the funniest situations he had ever been in.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
Ah. He needs a cigarette.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
His mind slowly shifts back to Sollux, who unsurprisingly had not even noticed him dozing off. Weirdly, he felt a little tired and out of it, but it was not in the bad way which meant he was letting himself sink into lost memories—it was in the good way which meant...he does not know what it meant. Something like safety ? Thinking about Cronus without wanting to cut his head clean off his body ? It was a little new to him.</p><p><br/>
Was this taste of dry tears and bitter honey the one of hope ? Maybe. He has no idea.</p><p><br/>
“Hey, Sollux,” his own voice sounds unnaturally quiet and soft, but it was getting late and the other probably did not care, “want to go grab a bite ? I'll pay. To thank you for your help.”</p><p><br/>
The other turns his face towards him, shaking his head. “I will accept the favour, but don’t thank me yet. I told you to keep that for when we actually find your bro. Also, we’re getting sushi and I don’t want to hear any complaints.”</p><p><br/>
“Sure. I like sushi.” </p><p><br/>
“You better.”</p><p><br/>
And when Sollux shows him a full toothed grin, glasses crinkling up as his cheeks flushed, Eridan thinks that maybe, just maybe, this would actually work out towards a happy end.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>bonus fun fact : Cronus could have just asked for money from his father to get the most fancy ring possible, but he refused. He didn't want any of his father's influence in his relationship...</p><p> </p><p>Again, thank you so much for reading, and I hope you enjoyed ! The plot thickens &gt;:)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. "what if" cocktail</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The Virgo sure as hell was a nice place. Nice barmaid, nice liquor, nice customers...</p><p>...nice intel.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>okay ummmm im really, really late and im sorry but ive had a bunch of things just crashing down on me as school ended so i just....lost strength to do anything. im back now ! </p><p>:) enjoy this chapter where the plot finally starts thickening properly (i think???im doing my best)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It is Thursday night when Sollux finds himself half-asleep in Dave's car that he actually realizes the full extent of what he was doing, and ends up being super proud of himself.</p><p><br/>He was finding leads for a case which had been given up on by their sergeant, and was actually making progress on it very fast as if it was just another normal mystery. A part of him is still viewing it as such, actually, because he had not really been around three years ago and so his point of view on it was warped. He supposes he had not been working on it long enough to give up on it yet, because goddamn were the leads coming up fast. </p><p> </p><p><br/>Wow, he really deserved a pat on the back. And maybe even a kiss from (Eridan) a cute guy or girl. He was invested in what he was doing, and had managed to convince Strider (the old one, not the one seated in the driver's seat and muttering some old cheesy rap) to give him full power over the case. It was his entirely, and he had time to work on it since the other cases he had been assigned were just really easy to solve robberies or other trivial matter. Working in the police force had made this kind of problems just everyday matter.</p><p><br/>What was not everyday matter, however, was him going to The Virgo, a bar downtown with Karkat and Dave after his shift, just to gather intel. The two were still on their few days off, but had accepted to join them because, and he could quote, Dave had missed going out with friends just for normal stuff which did not involve illegal smuggling and/or tortures. Although he had said it casually, it had made his fiancee's eye twitch so hard Sollux thought it would pop out of its socket.</p><p> </p><p><br/>Dave pulls over when they arrive at the street of the bar, quickly finding a spot as the road seemed awfully empty. Well, it was a Thursday night...</p><p><br/>“Right, Karkat filled me in for the details of the case,” he speaks as he turns his head to park better, eyes only quickly passing over Sollux, “but I didn't really understand why we're going drinking on a Thursday night. I’m not against seeing my loveliest drunk,” Karkat hits him “but don't you have work tomorrow ?”</p><p><br/>“I'm not planning on drinking.” Sollux shrugs back, tapping on his phone to tell Eridan that they had arrived, “We’re here for work after all.”</p><p><br/>The smaller guy sitting at the passenger’s seat grumbles. “Right, work. Nothing personal.”</p><p><br/>“Well, I mean, you’re here cause you love us and Kankri but—” Karkat interrupts him with an intelligible grunt, pushing his chin further down his turtleneck, “—but, I'm here because I need to prove Peixes I'm the best fucking detective the world has ever seen.”</p><p><br/>“You sure are.” Dave chuckles, and the other rolls his eyes. Sollux is almost (key word being ALMOST) jealous of the relaxing atmosphere between them.</p><p> </p><p><br/>He would never admit it, but Sollux Captor sometimes dreamed of soft words. It was embarrassing, really, but he did, and lived in full denial of it. Nobody, not even himself, was allowed to acknowledge that from time to time, he craved something soft, like a light brush of fingertips, an exchanged glance full of love, tiny kisses...? But he was 24 years old, and this sort of thing felt too childish now, so instead of that he preferred thinking of mature and realistic things like how much money he needed to save up for rent next month.</p><p><br/>When he gets out of the car, he stops for a moment to take a deep breath, happily filling his lungs with lukewarm night air mixed with the faint taste of salt. Eridan had mentioned that they were close to the docks, so close to the sea, and he likes it. Something about thinking of the big big puddle of blue reminds him of the Ampora's strange eyes, fixing him as he said “thank you” in the softest tone ever.</p><p> </p><p><br/>He blinks, hearing Karkat's sneakers hit the pavement with their usual bouncy strength, followed almost instantly by Dave's significantly less bouncy and sturdier steps. “Are you gonna keep on dumbly staring into the distance or can we get going ?” his  self-proclaimed best friend’s (in reality he preferred Arcadia) voice reaches his ears, so he turns around.</p><p><br/>“Nah, let's go. I was just thinking of some stuff.”</p><p><br/>“Thinking ? Sollux Captor, thinking ?”</p><p><br/>“Choke on a dick, Vantas.” He gets a loud snort as an answer. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>They meet Eridan in front of the bar, before going in, and he is unsurprisingly smoking while waiting for them. As he sees the trio, he almost bashfully puts his cigarette out on the wall and shakes it before throwing in a nearby trashcan. None of them comment on it, not even when the guy lets out a tiny strained cough into his fist. Sollux is not awkward around people who smoked; honestly, it was not his job to tell them how unsanitary it was because most of the time they were aware of what they were doing. But one thing is for sure; from the really obvious way Karkat glares at him and more specifically at the cigarette, he was definitely physically restraining himself from going on a rant.</p><p><br/>Then again, Karkat could rant about anything that only mildly annoyed him—it was a sort of Vantas thing to do. Sollux did not know Kankri that well, but from what he had heard about the university teacher it seemed as if he too liked expressing his opinion loudly.</p><p> </p><p><br/>“Alright, so I know you probably would rather be drinking than interrogating Porrim,” Eridan eventually says when they get inside the bar, immediately drawn to the warm air heavy with rich tobacco and fancy liquor (goddamn was this place different from what Sollux thought), “but I’d like to get this over with quickly.”</p><p><br/>“You don't like Porrim ?” He asks, catching the not-so-subtle way in which the Ampora's nose twitches.</p><p><br/>“Well, I do like her, but I haven't been here in a...long time, and she cares too much for my liking.”</p><p><br/>Karkat rolls his eyes. “That’s true ! Anytime she hung out with Kankri she always treated me like some kind of helpless kid. She means well ! But it pisses me off !”</p><p><br/>“You know her as well ?”</p><p><br/>“I'm actually surprised you don't.” Dave points out, though he looked distracted by a vintage-looking poster. “Everyone knows Porrim Maryam. She's like the godfather of this city except she’s a badass feminist and doesn’t kill people.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>“As much as I appreciate the compliment, I would enjoy if you didn't talk behind my back.”</p><p><br/>A low, strangely maternal voice makes Sollux’s head snap back up to the woman who had silently walked behind the counter, while all three guys with him shrink away in shy respect. “Uh, Hello ma'am.” He awkwardly says, waving a hand, cursing his companions’ lack of help.</p><p><br/>Porrim Maryam, or at least he guesses it was her, was...impressive. Not only was she super tall; the way her eyelids slightly drooped in a tired fashion, revealing shining emerald eye-shadow, just inspired class and effortless style. He picks up on a few piercings he can see on her eyebrows and ears, added up with the mystical patterns of tattoos swirling on her arms and a pitch black kinda scary shade of lipstick. Her intimidating poise was absolutely flawless</p><p> </p><p><br/>And oh god suddenly he feels really dumb with his old mustard hoodie and stupid glasses. Yeah, he can understand why the three looked so terrified. </p><p> </p><p><br/>“Hello to you too, young man,” wow, her tone was so warm, “and welcome to The Virgo.” She pauses, eyes imperceptibly sliding over to Eridan. “What brings you here ?”</p><p><br/>The guy opens his mouth, then closes it, before puckering it into a sort of pout. He was very aggressively evading her magnetic gaze. “I...thought you already knew.”</p><p><br/>“Did I ?” she raises an eyebrow. “I am not sure. Pray tell, what could have possibly brought you back here after so much time ?” ouch, she sounded pissed “Is Kanny being unreasonable again ?”</p><p><br/>“Kankri’s fine, thanks !” Karkat very impolitely interjects, suddenly opening his mouth again. From his rash voice, Sollux somehow feels like he was desperately trying to steer away from that conversation before it even started. Talk about family drama...</p><p><br/>“I will take your word for it.” Clearly, she would not. “I am still surprised at your visit, though. Surely, you aren’t just here for a drink, are you ?”</p><p><br/>Honestly, Sollux has no idea why the atmosphere had become so tense so quickly. He was not too close to this whole mess, and was thankful because it looked pretty chaotic, but he would not let it get in the middle of his investigation. They were here for clues, damn it !</p><p><br/>So he pulls his phone out, tapping to dig back the voice message. “We’re here for a police investigation, actually,” he quietly thanks Dave for sheepishly raising his badge up, “and we were wondering if you recognized...this.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>She takes the phone that is given to her, and at the gesture the detective realizes how sharp her perfectly manicured black nails were. Hoping it would end this annoyingly heavy tension, he indicates to her to listen to it, and she does, not without a certain sceptical look though. As she brings it to her ear, he turns back to the other three with thumbs up and is greeted in order with a roll of eyes, a sigh, and hesitant finger guns. They were here for the investigation anyways, not to catch up on weird sentimental issues.</p><p><br/>Just as Eridan had said; they wanted to get this over as quickly as possible. Porrim could probably only provide so much, and Sollux would be really surprised if she was deeply involved in the whole matter. Her appearance did stereotypically suggest illegal activity, but something about the way she spoke with the remaining Ampora (not remaining, fuck, Cronus was alive) told him that she could not have hidden such a big thing from him for so long. </p><p> </p><p>Besides, as she listens to the recording, the hand she had put on the counter twitches. The corners of her lips jerk up and down as well, perfect posture cramping up in the slightest. Just as he thought, she probably did not have too much intel to give them. Probably only emotional stuff.</p><p> </p><p><br/>But Eridan had said that music was the only thing Cronus knew how to not fuck up completely : which meant even the little intel she had could somehow be relevant. Or he really hopes it would be, because right now it was the only lead they had, and he absolutely needed it to be even a little bit relevant. His big brain would connect the dots later on. </p><p> </p><p><br/>“So, yes.” He perks up as she hands him the phone back, and if her hand trembles as she does, he does not say anything about it. “I know this man.”</p><p><br/>“No shit.” Karkat grumbles, earning a warning elbow in his ribs from Dave.</p><p><br/>Sollux once again quietly thanks the blonde man (really, with Eridan and Karkat losing it it appeared he could only rely on Strider for backup now). “Yeah, we know you know about Cronus,” real eloquent today, “and ED told me that the song in the background—you prolly heard it—was destined to you. So we’re here.”</p><p><br/>“I see.” She simply says, wearing an unreadable expression. He had to give it to her, she was good at keeping that poker face.</p><p><br/>But they did not have the time. “It’d be really cool if you could just tell us what you know so you can go back to your other customers.” He evenly explains in his good cop tone. At his words, and the very intense stares she was getting from Eridan, Karkat and Dave who had come closer to sit at the counter, Porrim sighs. Something in her tense position reluctantly melts down.</p><p><br/>“Alright.” She finally concedes. “But if any of you start interrupting me before I’m done, I won't tell you anything. Especially you, Karkat. Shut it.”</p><p><br/>The smaller guy’s mouth flies open immediately, but it snaps shut as simultaneously both Dave and Eridan interrupt him with a curt “okay”. He slumps down in his seat like a petulant child, and his eyes are screaming murder, but he stays quiet.</p><p> </p><p><br/>Porrim seems hesitant for a moment, twirling a strand of her pensively around her finger. “Before I start, could you tell me when you intercepted this call ?”</p><p><br/>“Oh--sure. It was last Saturday around 4 AM.”</p><p><br/>“I see.” Her expression darkens. “I suppose that makes sense.”</p><p><br/>“Porrim, look,” Sollux turns his head around, ready to chastise the one who had spoken up but stops dead in his tracks at his expression, “Can you please just tell us what's goin on ? Don't distract from the topic or any other bullshit because we don't have the time for that. Please.”</p><p><br/>From the way Eridan is digging his nails on the counter, looking pretty much ready to explode on the spot, the detective does not find anything to say. Sometimes he forgot what this investigation really meant to him. Very justified frustration was painted all over his features and obvious in his tone, and Sollux swears he can see his pupils shrinking in the middle of his blue eyes.</p><p> </p><p><br/>The woman at the counter softens, a bittersweet smile getting on her lips. “I apologize. You're right.</p><p><br/>“Cronus was here, last Thursday night. I didn't immediately recognize him, because he clearly didn't want to be recognized, but I still understood who he was from his order.”</p><p> </p><p>Eridan looks absolutely catatonic, but somehow still manages to let out a quiet hum. “We spoke for a bit, but he refused to tell me anything about what happened, and I tried to pry information from him at no avail. He just told me that it would be all over soon, and asked me to keep it secret. When I asked him if he would come back, he couldn't answer. I didn't try to stop him when he left.” </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>A beat of silence passes.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“So you just <em>let him LEAVE</em> ?”</p><p> </p><p><br/>Sollux stifles a cuss under his breath as Karkat, with his usual theatrics, gets up and effectively knocks down his chair as he does. The rare customers inside all curiously turn around, watching him slam his hands on the counter as hard as he could. Porrim's eyes are wide, surprised, and Dave only uselessly calls out his name.</p><p><br/>“He was, he was right there,” his voice is louder than usual—there  is something more in it, something completely unhinged “and you just let him go ?! After nobody fucking saw him in three, full, fucking, YEARS ?! And you were planning on just keeping it for yourself ?! Do you—” he breaks in a hysterical laugh, “Do you even REALIZE how FUCKING MESSED UP that is ?!”</p><p><br/>“Karkat.”</p><p><br/>“Oh don't you fucking Karkat me. How the fuck do you not expect me to be mad right now ?! What if we never got that call ! What if we never learned he was still out there ! Were you just going to stand here silently watching us keep breaking our fucking hearts thinking he had died all alone without even TELLING US ?!”</p><p><br/>“Karkat !”</p><p><br/>He reluctantly pauses, though looking absolutely ready to keep going, and crouches to pick the fallen chair up without even bothering to hide how pissed off it made him. Meanwhile, Sollux finds himself in a very, very delicate situation. He knew nothing about all of this—and even if Karkat was the type to rant often, this felt blown out of proportion.</p><p> </p><p><br/>Or...was it really ? This whole speech felt like being repetitively shot with painfully obvious facts. It reminds him of some repressed memories for a second—reminds him of the accident and so much pain and screaming and his head was buzzing and his brother was here but not really anymore and he had to accommodate and accept that he had lost him forever and—</p><p><br/>One of his hands finds itself clinging to his hoodie, trying to reach the ball of nerves which had been forcefully shoved there by Karkat. Shit, he thinks, focus. This is not about you. This is not about your brother, nor is it about his accident. This is about Cronus Ampora, who was very alive, and who you are going to save.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He takes a deep breath, ignoring how it hisses in his clenched throat. “If KK's done, can I ask a few more questions ?” His voice was a little shaky. Fuck.</p><p><br/>“Of course.” Porrim slowly says, eyes not really focusing on him. “Karkat...I know you may not understand, but I’m sorry. I just...he didn’t want any of you to know, because he knew you’d react like this.”</p><p><br/>“You still should have told us.” It is Eridan who answers instead of him, and his tone is surprisingly controlled given he was gripping the counter so hard Sollux almost fears the wood would crack under his fingers. </p><p><br/>“I know. And I'm sorry.” </p><p><br/>The officer sighs. “It's a bit too late for that, according to the voice message. If you had told us, we could have maybe...”</p><p><br/>“Stop.” Sollux knows what is hanging in those words. He knows the “what if”. He knows all the words Eridan could have said. “What if I had been there. What if I had stopped it. What if...”    .... But they were all useless, and so painful. The other is looking at him, and all those questions are drowning right there in his eyes. “Just...don't think about what could have happened.”</p><p><br/>He opens his mouth, and closes it without a sound (for what had been perhaps the hundredth time in the past minutes), before turning back at Porrim. “Okay. Okay, okay. Accordin to what you told us and the voice message,” Sollux almost chokes on his breath in pure relief as Eridan’s voice naturally sinks back to his professional cop tone, “Cronus thought his debt was almost fully repaid, and was probably plannin on comin back soon.</p><p><br/>“However, it seems that didn't turn out too well for him. He came here because he felt like he could relax a bit, and that would also explain the breach in security which allowed Captor to intercept that part of the conversation he had with...someone.”</p><p><br/>His grip on the table eases, and his fingers start drumming on the wood as he intensely stares at them. “He must have managed to include that tune while he was speaking because he was aware of the possibility of the police intercepting it—but we couldn't get too much info, because the person at the other side of the line kept their own protection at maximum. That makes sense.”</p><p> </p><p><br/>Sollux blinks, taken aback. “Wow, that’s, that's exactly what I was going to say. I thought uniformed officers didn't try their hands at deduction..?”</p><p><br/>“This is kind of obvious, though.” Dave points out, shrugging. “Not too hard to understand.”</p><p><br/>Eridan manages a tiny grin, only barely laced with pride. “I’ve been thinkin about this case a lot. You can guess why.”</p><p><br/>“Yeah.” He finds nothing else to say, really.</p><p> </p><p><br/>As he returns his attention to Porrim who had coughed, he notices that she is busying herself on the bar’s cash machine, and pulls out a five dollar bill which she puts on the counter in front of them. She stays silent a little more, hand on said bill.</p><p><br/>“Uh, this is your bar, we're the ones who should pay,” Dave remarks, leaning forward, “not that I don't want any money but,”</p><p><br/>“This is the bill Cronus used to pay. I kept it in case something happened...I thought you little policemen could do some scientific shit on it.” She explains, almost hesitantly taking her fingers off it. They all stare at it for a few more seconds, as if it was some sort of relic; Sollux honestly just does not take it immediately out of respect, instead patting himself down to check if he had anything to put it in. He would feel bad shoving it in his crummy wallet.</p><p> </p><p><br/>Before he can even find a place, Karkat snatches the bill. He almost fears the other would rip it apart, but against all odds, he just not-so-delicately shoves it in a plastic bag before handing it to Sollux. “I dunno how useful it's gonna be, since a lot of people touched it, but that weirdo friend of yours will probably manage some shit with it.”  </p><p><br/>“Right, Aradia will figure something out.” He incredulously answers, putting the plastic bag in his hoodie's pocket. He is a little surprised at Karkat just casually coming back to the conversation without yelling again, but it seemed that guy would remain a mysterious ball of constantly switching shades of anger.</p><p><br/>“Anyways,” Porrim speaks up again, gesturing to the liquor behind her, “I don't have any more clues to give out here, I’m afraid. But I do have alcohol.”</p><p><br/>As Dave encourages Karkat to get a drink, starting up another topic of more casual conversation with her, Sollux realizes that Eridan was getting up, rummaging through his pockets for his package of cigarettes, probably. He gets up as well, to follow him because after this he was not really in the mood for alcohol (and he did not have that much money to spend either). As he gestures to the other two that he was going, he shares a quiet but heavy look with the Vantas.</p><p> </p><p><br/>Feeling a little overwhelmed by so much emotion—god, this was going to end up reminding him of even more forsaken memories—he gets out. The air of the bar was too rich, too heavy, and his head was still spinning from earlier's outburst. He had thanked Porrim, of course, the woman had given them all she could, and with the forensics analysis of this bill they could probably pinpoint where it came from or...something...He reminds himself to check the street cameras for anyone getting to the bar at the time and day she had told them as well.</p><p> </p><p>Those all constituted a pretty solid amount of clues to get looking further later on. They knew where he had last been seen—which thankfully was not even a week ago, and could retrace it all from there, right ? Except that was also what had been given to Meenah three years ago, and they all knew how that had ended up. </p><p> </p><p><br/>But Sollux was better than Meenah, and he had a pretty well motivated team (because yes, technically he was the boss of this investigation), so it could only end with victory. Obviously.</p><p> </p><p><br/>He is thankful for the split second of cold salty air which refreshes him right before a bunch of nicotine hits him full face. He scowls immediately, head snapping to the side where Eridan stood, back against the wall and usual cigarette between his lips. And he looked like shit.</p><p><br/>“That’s really not good for your health.” Sollux reprimands, almost automatically. He knew he had told himself this was not his business, but... Well, even he could feel pity.</p><p><br/>“If you're here to insult my habits, go away.” The guy grumbles, staring at a point in front of him. When he sighs, smoke rolls down his face like tears.</p><p><br/>Shrugging, he walks next to him, mimicking his position. From this angle of view in the street, they were staring at a random house. There was nothing special about it, nothing really worth staring at, but Sollux finds himself drawn to the still picture. His throat felt a little scratchy from the smoke.</p><p> </p><p><br/>A car passes in front of them without slowing down. “You have mismatched eyes.” Eridan points out, gesturing with his cigarette for emphasis.</p><p><br/>“How d'you notice from behind my glasses ?”</p><p><br/>“I guessed.” A tiny smile (Sollux wonders if he was capable of smiling wider. He also wonders what could make him smile wider.) comes on his face. “I couldn't find any other reason why you'd wear such ugly glasses.”</p><p><br/>He gasps, offended. “These are super cool, shut up.”</p><p><br/>“Whatever you say.”</p><p> </p><p>Eridan chuckles, bringing the cigarette out of his mouth before turning his head away from him to exhale smoke. They are back to silence again, but it is not unpleasant. It was weird, really, because the last silences Sollux had shared with him had either been too heavy with emotion or too awkward and immediately broken. Right now, there was emotion, of course; it was way too evident from how the officer breathed smoke as if he needed it to live; but it did not feel...too much. It was comfortable.</p><p> </p><p><br/>He thinks. Searches for something to say. But not in that nervous desperate way to break the silence—it was just because he wanted to say something to Eridan. “Are you okay ?” no, they both knew the answer to that one. “Stop smoking.” no, that would just be an asshole move.</p><p> </p><p><br/>He thinks some more.</p><p> </p><p><br/>Then, “You know we're gonna find him, right ?”</p><p><br/>“I know.” Eridan pauses, looking intensely at the cigarette between his fingers. Sollux wonders if he really knows, or if he was saying this to appear strong, or to convince himself. “I know.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Maybe whether he knew or not did not matter so much. What a lousy thing to ask.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>bonus fun fact : although karkat hangs out with kanaya often he's not a big fan of her sister. mainly because of unfounded accusations built on her appearance, but also because he felt like she had tried doing "things" to kankri in the past. he's totally wrong !! porrim is a wonderful friend &gt;:( ...</p><p>i hope next chapter will take less time to come ^^; sorry again !</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>bonus fun fact : jake is actually not the best sniper ever, but due to an accident he was not allowed to go in the ground force. he still insisted to participate to the intervention, so (his husband) dirk allowed him to join the sniper team. </p><p> </p><p>this was the intro, and the following chapters will be longer, i promise ! hang on and enjoy :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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